"Doomed 'Raider'"
by Scott Mantz

"Lara Croft: Tomb Raider"
Angelina Jolie, Jon Voight
Directed by Simon West

Lock and load! Angelina Jolie is out to save the world in "Tomb Raider"

Historically speaking, movies based on video game characters haven't exactly set the box office on fire. While "Mortal Combat" certainly worked on a very basic level for the popcorn-munching crowd, I'm sure we can all agree that the world could have done without the John Leguizamo-Bob Hoskins starrer "Super Mario Brothers."

That said, there are certain actors who look (and act) so much like fictional characters, that a movie has to be made to capitalize on their appearance. When it came to the casting of Lara Croft, the ass-kicking heroine of the popular "Tomb Raider" video game series, there was no doubt as to who should play the part: Angelina Jolie. Actually, considering that Jolie was the physical embodiment of Lara Croft before the video game was even created, it was a given that the film version would be the cinematic equivalent of a sure thing.

Well, so much for sure things. Talk about a missed opportunity, not only does the film fail to pick up where the "Indiana Jones" film series left off (sorry, Brendan Fraser, but you're no Indiana Jones either!), but it also continues the tradition that when it comes to video games, it's a lot more fun to play them than it is to watch them.

After a lifetime spanning the globe in search of precious treasures left over from long-lost empires, archeologist-extraordinaire Lara Croft (Angelina Jolie) is about to embark on her most amazing adventure yet. When the planets align for the first time in 5,000 years, an incredible power will be unleashed from two ancient artifacts that are caught between space and time. With the help of her trusty sidekick (Noah Taylor) and loyal butler (Chris Barrie), Croft must find these artifacts before her mortal enemy (Manfred Powell) uses their power to threaten the future of all mankind.

"Tomb Raider" has the dubious distinction of making "The Mummy Returns" look like an intellectual challenge. While both movies are veritable special effects shows, at least "The Mummy Returns" doesn't take itself too seriously. The fact that "Tomb Raider" does, not only accentuates the banality of the story and the absurdity of the dialogue, but it also insults the intelligence of the audience.

I know, what do you expect from a movie that's based on a video game, right? Well, the slightest shred of character development would have been nice. As it is, while I'd jump through hoops to see a buffed-up Angelina Jolie bounce off the walls in her tight shorts while blasting away at the bad guys, there was never any reason to believe that she was in any real danger, and there was never a point where I really cared about her character.

It's safe to say that while Jolie won't be getting an Academy Award for "Tomb Raider" anytime soon, it's quite obvious that she was born to play Lara Croft. A cross between Indiana Jones and James Bond, Croft gives Jolie the chance to act out her wild reputation (Jolie's bizarre behavior runs from sleeping with knives to wearing a vial of hubby Billy Bob Thornton's blood around her neck). There's even a chance for her to exorcise some of her family demons, as the one scene that she shares with her father, Jon Voight, could have come from a real-life conversation.

With the success of TV shows like "Xena: Warrior Princess" and "Witchblade" and movies like "Charlie's Angels" and "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon," "Tomb Raider" continues the tradition of strong female action heroes. There's a good film in Lara Croft, but considering that director Simon West ("Con Air," "The General's Daughter") relies too heavily on been-there-done-that action sequences (not to mention bad dialogue), this isn't it. As for Jolie, one can certainly sympathize with her desire to do something different, but as far as this film is concerned, game over.

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